We walked to a store that I would usually drive my car to
It was cold that night so I knew
that you would ask to borrow a sweatshirt and
I wanted you to wear my sweatshirt but
while you were putting it on I felt scared
because I couldn’t see your face through all the black cloth and
I thought you might suffocate and die in my room.
I told you that I liked your hair because I was still frightened
that you might put your hood on
and I thought that when we got to the store
I would ask for paper bags instead of plastic.
While we were walking on the sidewalk sometimes
our hands would touch on accident
so I put mine in my pockets and felt ashamed
because I wanted you to be comfortable.
We started talking about smoking weed in high school
and how you voted for someone and not someone else
and I realized that I hate politicians more than
I hate myself when I am walking on a sidewalk with you.
When we got to the store you said it was hot and
I wanted to say that I was sorry for making that happen and
I wanted to apologize for every other bad thing I’ve done,
but the fluorescent light made it hard to talk
so I kept looking at you
and eventually I forgot that you were cold.
On the walk home cars passed us and I said that
sometimes cars look like they’re smiling.
But when it’s cold and we’re outside
I can see your breath.